Comments on: Redefining Beauty

By: Andrea Owen

Andrea Owen — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 21:47:19 +0000

Sara,
Thank you so much for your comment, it warmed my heart. That's beautiful that you have such a great relationship with God and have come to the realization of what is beautiful at such a young age!
I encourage you to speak to girls about this. You're not too young at all! They need someone their age with that message! Check out Kate Whitfield; she's a young woman who speaks about this and started very young. She's made a living doing it. I've met her in person and she's a typical 24 year old girl with a passion for helping other young girls: http://www.empoweredgal.com/meet-kate.php

By: Andrea Owen

Andrea Owen — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 20:47:19 +0000

By: Sara

Sara — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 19:18:03 +0000

I'm 16 years old and I can totally agree...
I've fought with this for about 5 years. I used to starve myself. I had friends who would through up. I would wear bigger shirts to hide my "what i thought" was a huge stomach, even though I wear size 5 jeans. I used to talk to my best friends about it telling them I feel fat. Or I wish i wasn't fat. And they would look at my crazy saying I'm a beautiful girl. I'm not fat. I have beautiful curves. I'm 5'2 and weight 130. I never believed them.

But i've grown faith in my relationship with God. I know He knows I'm the most beautiful girl in His eyes. And that number 130 means nothing in this world. It's just a number. He is gunna care less about what I look like. He made me the way He wanted me. The most important thing is I'm comfortable. Even though I still struggle with it, I try to fix it. I stopped starving myself and started eating healthy and working out. My goal isn't too get thinner, or fit in with the media, but to be comfortable in my own body. And that's exactly what I'm starting to do.

This issue isn't only about weight. It's about being half clothed in public, puttin a cigarette in their mouth, puttin all these tattoos and piercings on their body. They think it makes them more beautiful because of media. It's wrong. None of that makes you more beautiful. It's who you are on the inside. How big of a heart you have.

I believe girls today need to just sit down, look in the mirror and realize whats beautiful about themselves. If people are going to judge them because of their weight then are those people really worth it? Theyre are so many people that are going to love you for who you are on the inside. Because whats on the inside is SO much beautiful than ANYTHING on the outside.

It breaks my heart how people define beauty today. Literally. Girls are mistreating themselves because of the media. It makes no sense. Every girl is beautiful. They all are worth so much more. It's so sad how our society is. I agree on this.

Even at the age of 16 I wanna talk to younger girls and tell them the MEDIA is wrong. It's time to take a step up and make a change. Lets "redefine beauty."

By: andreaowen

andreaowen — Sat, 15 Aug 2009 02:29:44 +0000

Hi Jennifer! I just emailed you. Glad I could help!

By: Jennifer L. Pozner

Jennifer L. Pozner — Sat, 15 Aug 2009 00:46:59 +0000

Andrea Owen: can you please give specific citations for each of the statistics you reference here:
* The average American women is 5’4” and weighs 140 pounds
* The average model is 5”11” and weighs 117 pounds
* Most fashion models are thinner than 98% of American women
* 42% of girls in first through third grade want to be thinner
* 80% of women say that the images of women on TV, in movies fashion magazines and advertising makes them feel insecure

Mentioning the two entities that you got the stats from is somewhat useful, but it would be even more helpful if you could provide links or full references to the actual studies or pages where you got these numbers.

I'm a journalist; I'd appreciate if you would email this info to info[at]wimnonline[dot]org

Thank you.

By: andreaowen

andreaowen — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 03:33:19 +0000

@ Marie- I like what you said, “make sure our girls are comfortable with who they are developing into”. Don't wait until they are already in their teens to try to teach them an important lesson.

By: Marie

Marie — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 23:55:21 +0000

This is an awesome reminder that we really need to make sure our girls are comfortable with who they are developing into. I try to be open and honest w/my daughter, but there are things that will still catch you off guard.

Keep the lines of communication open. Don't settle for one word answers to questions. Always let her know she is beautiful – especially when someone else tells you she is…..let your daughter know that as well.

Thanks for the Great Piece and for the work you do!

By: andreaowen

andreaowen — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 14:43:43 +0000

@ Annamaria- I agree w/ you; the younger we reach these girls the better. When I started doing workshops I thought 8 years old was too young, but after speaking to them I see that it's not too young at all! They have already seen so much through the media, movies, ads, internet and adults that can be negative influences. Even just introducing what self esteem and body image is at that age is powerful!

@ Michael- Congrats on your baby daughter! My daughter is due in September

@ Pace- I agree! I have cancelled catalog subscriptions like Victoria's Secret and will not watch channels like E! or any other reality shows that have negative messages.

By: Pace

Pace — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 14:09:01 +0000

Well said, Andrea! More power to you!

In addition to spreading positive self-love messages, another way we can decrease the influences of the media on girls is to opt out of media as much as possible. Not watching TV, for instance, goes a long way. It's no substitute for self-love, but at least it helps reduce the negative messages entering our eyes and brains.

By: David St. Pierre

David St. Pierre — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 13:46:30 +0000

As a guy, I can tell you that the so called “models” that are out today are extremely unattractive to me. They're anorexic skinny and if girls today think they should look like them, they ARE being taught the wrong thing. Obviously it's better for everyone if they’re “healthy”, but it still boils down to parents doing their job. If you can't talk to your child about something as small as the way they look, you might as well give up now because you just lost.

I also think there should be a standard though. If someone (guy or girl) is anorexic or obese; they should know that they have a problem that needs attention. AND THEY SHOULD DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! So I don’t necessarily agree that “every” person is beautiful, but if you’re within 30 pounds of what you should be, you are whether your pretty or not. It’s the harsh truth. It’s kind of nice to have a women’s point of view every once in a while too by the way. Good post!